no strings attached;
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8/31/2009
noone but me from URL @ 5:20 PM HAHAHAHAHAH. Anatidaephobia- fear of being watched by a duck. HAHAHAHA think about it! It's quite scary actually! Like that furby in SM's office watching you. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Homgzz i'm going nutzzzz bye.
noone but me from URL @ 4:59 PM Regulate already. I have a new fear. I fear that people or animals will pass away in their sleep. & i'm not refering to old people but people like- for argument's sake- your parents or your dog. The people you least expect to, the people you need around the most. Like especially if they're sick and they take a nap. I have this almost suffocating fear- as if i myself stop breathing- at the thought that they might just stop breathing and never wake up. That they might die and i wouldn't even know it. Its this fear that does not cease until i go and check for myself that that person is still breathing. I get a comfort seeing the chest rise and fall at least thrice before that stifling feeling goes away; it goes away only to come back though. ): I keep checking on my mother and monty but not my brother cos his door is always locked. I don't like being fearful. It's painfully chronic & i have too much to lose. 8/29/2009 noone but me from URL @ 10:10 PM I wanna take you away, lets escape into the music Happy Birthday Natalie Wee! (26/8) I think your bday timing sucks to the coreeee, but it will all be worth it when you do well in the As k? Anw i hope that you enjoyed your day & i really do miss you being part of my everyday life ): I know school sucks and all but endureeee, and then we can all go have the time of our lives together :D Thanks for having been sucha dear friend to me (& on sat i was in such an awful mood so you were like some godsent angel aww haha) Yeap, happy birthday ann weeee! I love you many many! Happy Birthday Ganesh! (27/8) Another one who's bday timing sucks but heyhey, your day went well! Glad that yr bday luck materialised! Anw, I realise that i've only knownknown you for quite a short time but even then you've become a good friend :> Thanks for never failing to make me laugh (& annoy me at the same time) and thanks for always being around. (I should thank you for yr hp too haahaaa) Yeap, happy birthday dooood, i want to say i love you manymany but that'd just be wrong so here's three smileys for you :> :> :> Happy Birthday Aaron (11/8), Li chu (19/8), Monty, Mrs Hariram & Feeezaaaa (28/8) & Prem in advance! (31/8) Happy birthday lichuu, i miss you very much & happy birthday feeezaaa, now you old makcik, glad you had a lovely day! & happy birthday premmmm, now you old uncle, hope you have a lovely day! Peiting says its ridiculous to celebrate a dog's bday ): I make all these birthdays seem like they're some arduous task or sth, but nonooo, lovely days! :D Good, precious pplz were born. Anyway, life's been fineeee. Haven't met/talked to a gazillion people in a long while, but haven't been studying that much to account for the first statement either. I've just been/am being a disgusting lazy pig who deserves to be shot because i'm just screwing myself over with what i'm doing right now. Howellzzz, life's still fineeee. Haaaahaaaa. It's time i start making the prelims and the As my life (think i've said that before) but somehow i just can't. I actually don't want to either. There are so many things that are so much more worthwhile, i think. But well, gotstostrikezeebalanzeeeandgotstodoitsooonzzzzz. Now actually. I have this love-hate relationship with my home now. I hate being home cos i never get anything (&no not an understatement) done, but i loveee going home cos, well, its home. Still love my bed manymany though. Highlights of my recent-life! Celebrated bro's bday at my aunty's place. Immersing myself in family-time always gets me happy! :D  Went to hq & prem drove me in! :D stylomilo very much. Got to see so manymany people and talktalktalk and as always it felt damn good. Starbucks with roopi at thomson plazaaa! Finally bought someone that kind of balloon! "Be my tweeetheart" How cute righttttttttt!! Yesyes, roopi too. Study dates with peiting- always fun and productive! Love meeting my 4i lovelies in the morning, good times sitting around chatting/bitching with adlin rachel & whoever's there. Ice cream chef with adlin & then ayam penyet later with nurin too :D gooood foooood. Caught GI Joe (awesome btw!) with the pandiz!  and the proposal with adlin! & we are suckerrrr very much for sweet guys, shitheadz. Studied at the airport with & while zarifah was working which was productive vvvmuch! & then there were downdays which i shall spare you from, but thank god they're over. & okay, insert bits of KI IS and more studying in between k? Plus random shitzz! Heh.  See, life's good! :D Anyhooos, I've got my plan B and i'm taking it for granted that it's gna work. Its definately sth i can live with, in fact something i think i will enjoy minus the regrets of not getting plan A. I'm more convinced that plan A won't work out actually. Because i'm scared, intimidated, and just not confident that i can pull it off. Why? Because i'm bloodyhell not studyingggggg. People like me are the worst i think. I can say that i'm not studying, tell the whole world that i'm not studying, and still not study. Im so tempted to insert a "haahaaa" but i wont. Okk i shall try get sth done tonight, I miss the friends who used to be a constant. ): bye! (i want to live in a happily-ever-after hollywood movie, shhh) We could pack up and leave all our things behind, no fact or fiction or storyline
8/20/2009 noone but me from URL @ 10:21 PM I think that we should stop taking it for granted that hearts will beat, because one day, someday, they won't. I hate myself for being superficial. Hate it that i only realise what's important when it's on the verge of being lost. Hate it when i find traits in myself that i used to hate in other people. I hate it that i'm living this hedonistic lifestyle when i know for myself that i am not this kind of person. Hate it that i find conformity a need, hate it that i conform. I hate it that i'm losing the drive that use to drive me, hate it that i'm not doing anything about it. Yeah, i realise that there are a whole lot of things that i hate about myself, but i also realise that they are things that i can do something about. I don't know how i live with myself sometimes. Sometimes when shit happens, you want to believe that it happens for a reason. For me, I need to believe that it happens for a reason, that it was God's will, and i need my faith for that. & i need to not need shit for me to realise that i need my faith. Seriously? Above everything, i hate myself for that the most. Nope i'm not in a self-destructive mode, i'm fine. Just been thinking. Lit today with Ho was so amazing that i teared. Did you know that Virginia Woolf committed suicide by filling the pockets in her overcoat with stones and walking into the river Ouse? She drowned. Leonard and i were so upset about it. ): Ask me, i'll tell you all about it. It's depressing. I really enjoy learning i realise. Apart from practical maths (cos there's nothing to understand, its just formulae), history, literature, econs and KI are so extremely interesting that i almost never, ever, feel sleepy in lessons. There's just so much that i don't know, and so much that i'm learning about- more than just the subjects- through all these subjects that its nothing short of brilliant. If there wasn't such a thing called the Freaking As which sucks alll the joy out of learning, i would happily troop to school each day for lessons. I think the amazing teachers contribute to a big part of this too. (I enjoy learning, but i enjoy being lazy even more and i hate myself for that too) I realise that i'm now interested in anthropology on top of psychology. & i'm also interested in sociology. & political sciences :/ I've gotta narrow it down so i can start all my damn uni applications. Uni appz haaaa. That's something. I appreciate the friends i have. The friends who make a smile, make me laugh, who spare a thought. & as much as i may hate so much about myself, (don't get me wrong, its just these characteristics, i'm not depressed or anyth) i'm extremely blessed for the people around me. Especiallllly, my mother ): i'm scared. in a way that makes me tremble. goodnight. So hold me closer and don't let go, i'm falling so please just don't let go 8/17/2009 noone but me from URL @ 10:50 PM In not so many words, I can only give you so much as you will take. & in case even if in these few words you manage to miss the point, i will give, if you want to take. Yes. Bye. 8/13/2009 noone but me from URL @ 1:04 PM Happy Eighteenth Roopi Boopi! :D  Hi hello my dearest friend! (This reminds me so much of the autistic chalet picture haha!) Although you're the 18 year old who managed to do it all before she got legal, welcome to the official club yozz! :D K & now i pause because i don't know what to say because you mean so much more to me than i myself will ever realise i think. Welll, one thing's that you have become so much more than a close friend that i think we've become almost inextricable; it feels like as if more than a part of you grows in me and more than a part of me grows in you and while this might scare the hell out of me if it was someone else, i want to say thank you. Because there is no one else in this entire world i'd ever trust more than myself, but you. My life would suck without you rooopiboooopi! Aku cinta padamoooooo! :> ---- Well anyways, national day was spent at roopi's with the good old good old loves. & hey, we took the pledge and sang the national anthem okay! Highlight was of course the wonderful surprise that for the first time ever, nobody spoilttttt! (& its so typical of roopi to come in mouth and hands filled with food, pandipandi) Awesome surprise, good food, how well do you know/not know roopi game, fashion parade, taboo madness, midnight wishes, lovely company and lots and lots and lots of love! :} I'm glad you enjoyed yourself Roopi, and i'm glad the rest of us did too. Fashion parade hohoho!  You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, finally eighteen! Taboo madness and the hidden pscyho lwin monster homgzz.  This smiles :>:>:>:>:>:>:>:>:> 10 smileys roopi, go figure heh.  Nobody nobody but chuuuuu! :D  & of course my delta dearests. Like what fad said, if you put a picture of us 4 years back alongside with this, it'd be unbelievable. Prettypretty very much, i'm glad we've got staff merdin platoon's genes haha! Anw, i love all of you dearests! The best part's that we've all changed so much, but we haven't really changed so much at the same time. Take away the glam and glitter we're all still the vulturous little girls who love to laugh and play :> Love ya'll veryverystrawberrymanymanymuch!  --- Haaaaaaah, I feel so happy and satisfied just blogging this day down. You know how once in awhile you get to leave everything behind and have the time of your life? If you don't then i pity you because yes, such days do exist and yes, that night was one of them. Pure happiness, silly laughter and good old company. I still think friends are magic because of the effect we have on each other. Don't need no magician when you've got love yo. Just the one night with the ones you love, timeless :} I'm home, sick grrrr. I need to troop my way to the polyclinic soon cos i refuse to pay 60bucks for a measely sore- throat and cough. Okay maybe its not so measly because it's annoying me to the core so yes, i shall go. Cmates are falling sick 1 by 1, takecare world, goodbye. I can take your problems away, with a nod and a wave of my hand 8/07/2009 noone but me from URL @ 5:49 PM We're spiralling down, Happy Birthday Nicole! (3/8) I couldn't find any pictures of us so here goes the dedication! You little sadistic girl haha, not much of you has changed at all from back in 06-07 except that you've grown uglierrrrr! mwahahaha. Haha, kidding! Hello nicoleng the annoying! I love you veryvery much although you like to whack me and bully me and do all sorts of things to me. I'm just extremely glad that we managed to keep to our pact of 'togethergether', so thank you very much for having been there for me these past 1.5 years at vj. Vj would have sucked like a gazillion times if not for you and the rest, and yr constant sadistic smiles and punches and incessant whinings :> Hehhh, happy birthday nicole the beeootifoool! I loveeee youuuu. Happy Birthday Muu! (3/8)  Hello my darling mynahhh! :) It's so difficult to meet up and talk to you now but whenever we do, it feels like nothing's lost between us and i loveeeee youuuuu for that. And although you're quite far away and although we don't talk as much as we used to, i just want you to know that you are an extremely lovely and special girl to me and i will neverever let you go! (bluekzz to firdaus! HAHA) Haha, keep growing prettier & fatter too please! I love you my mynah! Happy Birthday Nurin! :D :D (5/8)  You look like sucha cute litttle cookie monster-angel here hahahah. OMG YOU SHOULD BE HONOURED! Im actually posting a glam picture of you and saying nice stuffs okay! Haha. Anw happy eighteenth my darling poohbearr! If i were to thank you for everyth you've done for me there'd be no start nor end so with you i guess i'll just say thanks for the past 6 years and thanks because i know that we're gna be friends for much longer :) You are annoying, perverted and just annoying but i love you exactly the way you are and wouldn't change a single hair on yr head. (uhm, i wouldn't have said that in those sec 2 lulu years HAHA) You know you've got a friend in me like i know i've got a friend in you. I love you nurin amalia bte abdul majiddddd! I hope you enjoyed yr little bday celeb and present! :> :>  
Happy Birthday Varruna! (5/8)  -- First week of august, and four birthdays already yozz. Not even including my aunty and cousin hoho. So manymany more and while the funds in my atm are just going down down down, my excitement is going up up up! :> Such joyous occasions, I thank God. Anyhoo, check it outtt! I met patricia on weds after like almost a whole year i think! Gosh.  I agree with her in saying that some things never change, even while changing. Awesome dinner but meeting her was really the best thing of the night. We talked quite a lot about quite a lot of things and it felt perfectly comfortable. 6 years and counting. If we can not meet for a year and still feel the way we did on wednesday, i think we can do anything together patricia! :) December next k! haha. Anyway thursday was a bitchass day at school. Bitch. Ass. I tell you. Thank you to the yous who cared and check out my sweeeet classmates :) Rachel who gave me a pretty little note with this on the back! HAHA. Look at me! A cute little cupcake with a rifle! & her with her ugly fishmouth face.  And my darling honey peiting who gave me such a prettypretty note/letter/motivational statement plus sweeeeets. Look at how much effort she put into it! I think she is truly the nicest and sweetest girl i've ever met. We had some weird telepathy cos we both gave each other stuffs, but i think we just get each other that way. I wish we were friends from much earlier instead of just now. Ah well, sucha sweet sweet girl.  Which leads me to say that i am truly blessed for most of the people around me. I think i should start being waaaaay nicer to everyone who mean just that bit more to me. It's really nice when people are nice to you and i think it's really nice to be nice to people too. Look at meee, i'm turning into a big fat purple dinosaurrrr! No but really. I love all of you, you know? Very much. & I hate it when people take others for granted. Hate. It. Pisses the hell out of me and i start going GRRRRRRR and then i get a sore-throat, grrrrr. Anw, national day at school today with the classmates and sus and hasina was fun! :D Haha, played taboo pictionary and charades and had a hellll lotta laughs :D Welllll anyway, i'm most probably going to malaysia tmr, back on monday morningggg. I'd really rather the swine flu than go but haiiiii. The only way i can not go is if the fever i have now starts shooooting upup and away :/ 37.5 now but it's gg downdowndown sigh. Roopi there's hope yet but please dont be angry with me ): ‘Cause sometimes you feel tired, feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up. But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength and just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse. I'm on my way to a strike out, for my sake please let me. the best you can do is to fake it, sometimes you cant make it, on your own. 8/02/2009 noone but me from URL @ 9:52 PM In loving memory of,  I cannot believe that someone would be so mean as to remove our picture! ): It barely lasted 3 days ): Curse the dick/cbhead mannz. (unless it was pee po pee po tong tong cheng & hahaha!) Its okay la zarifah, we can take manymany more and keep putting and putting k? So mean, tskkk ): -- Anywayyyy, saturday night was nicely spent! In fact, one of the nicest in awhile. Fireworks, ice cream & maggie goreng in our little adventure around singapore with the damn public transportation against us haha. I hope nights like that become a constant after the As. Chats and carefree laughs that come with the comfort of close company :>  These two so cuuuut-eeee, hahaha.  --- I think that i find it easier to talk to certain individuals on the phone or on msn, as long as there's some physical distance between us two. It's like, not looking at them while speaking makes things that matter more easily said, i wonder why. I think its got to do with dealing with judgements but hohummz. It has its drawbacks doesn't it? I realise that a lot gets lost along the way. I actually do treasure catching that twinkle of an eye, the crinkling of the nose, the shy smile, the throbbing vein, the tough face, and whatever that makes what one says just that bit more personal. It speaks for a whole lot more than the comfort we get without. I like people watching haha. & im done being confused and neither here nor there so yes yo, i've made up my mind dont need to think it over. Strikeeeeeeee, out! My mom's friend has a laser that can be seen on the freaking mooon!! Its some green US army laser and now the 2 of them are disturbing some indian women who are taking their late night walks ahahaha. Sucks that the 'yeah yeah yeah's have stopped cos i still cant make out the rest of what he's saying hahaha. Oooops. Howellz. Okay, i'll be back tmr to start my first dose of bday shoutouts! Excitinggggg! :D K i've set 'Beautiful' as my alarm ring tone, may it be a beootifooool week for you toooo! :D HAHAHA. so damn beautiful
8/01/2009 noone but me from URL @ 10:25 AM I hear with my mind's ear, Papa-papa-paparazzi! This is for gravity. That's Alonso.  We wanted to take an 'excited!' picture & our mouths just popped open.  Last pe lesson, in our entire lives ):  adlin looks really upset HAHAOur day at hogwartzzzz!  (+suria!)Ice cream makes us happy! Our picture seems to be waaay brighter than the rest. (&later met holmez!! and nora!)  Rachel's the goddess of baking.  Adlin's the macdonalds of baked rice.  This is the h2 math class that got 100% passes for ct2s, gna get 100% As.  Harris who's leaving ): I think i really will miss him.  This is Mr Cook with his top 2 econz students!  (believe it if you will, suckerz!)o8A11 (minus huimin), mr teo, mr ho, ms chia, mr sayers, mr cook, mr harris. Hurr, our first and last class party i think, had fun!  Harris again, demonstrating exactly why i'll miss him.
 Redswan, haikarellaaa & RoopiBoopi! :D  (&later zarifah and sly!)5mins of fireworks=sexciting baby!  Okay i think a tad bit more happened but this is the gist of it; happy days, see? :> Hi hello friends, i'm damn glad that i have you people, please continue to make me smile. Yesterday was disgusted with people day and im sorry if i sulked at you, i dont deal well with bad days. After school was waaaay better though :> I think i know who and what i'll miss when i leave vj. Yes, definately my class with the uniquely weird individuals, but more so after school with the usual indianz talking and laughing and then studying, and then talking and laughing again haha. I'm glad i've found a constant in this school. In the words of lincon, 'better late, than later' hahaha. & of course i'll miss eyecandy spotting HAHA & the treehouse & the beach and okay i shall stop because i'm not graduating. yet. (Have i mentioned that im very angrryyyyy with all the unoriginal parents who decided to have sex in december? BLOODYHELL, you'd think they'd be more spontaneous! 12 months a year and so typically they just haaaad to pick december, grrr. Love you muchos nachos all gazillion of you august babiezz tho! Yr parents are another issue.) Alrightyho! I'm off, roopi & sexciting fireworks await me today! :> Yes new smiley! :> :> :> Have a good weekend ya'll! stars are holding you, holding you, tonight.
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Hello, I'm sarahJ 290491 ex-cedarian, victorian NCC- delta 07, cadet officer |
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Friends abigail adlin cheryl esther fadhilah hasyimah hazwani li chu jessica jingyin kathleen li chu narmadha nishanthi marliyana muhaina mujia natalie nicole nurin marliyana patricia pohsin rupini shanisza shermaine sunmeng suria xiaowei zaferin zarifah zerlina |
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